My Public Library's Adult Depression Kit
A Non-Review
Recently, I have been spending a lot of time at my public library working – ignoring the five brilliant libraries we have on campus. The public library is great; children, adults, parents, teenagers, university students: a place for all.
Last week, I noticed a translucent black backpack on a shelf, and I studied it from a distance 4-5 times, it was an Adult Mental Health Backpack Kit: Depression. It had books, laminated worksheets, informational leaflets, and more. One could check it out for 3 weeks, with one renewal. I looked through their website, and found that they've made these backpack kits for children, tweens, and adults, with various topics such as anger, anxiety, bullying, grief, sadness. For adults, it was depression and anxiety.
I was ecstatic to learn about this, I checked-out the backpack. This article is my journey and thoughts through all the books in the backpack, a quick look at the worksheets, and lots of reflections.
Two things before we proceed,
1] There is a big underlying cause for my writing this: this kit is available at my public library. The membership is free, it is open for everyone. It has free wifi, and computers you can access for free. I have seen people come in and apply for jobs, work on other things that require internet if they don't have access to it, teens and young adults browsing. When I checked it out, the man at the desk smiled at me as usual, no questions asked.
It is important everyone has access to things like this, especially if they don't have resources. I am not saying it will cure their current depressive episode, make everything better, or make them more motivated to get out of bed. Although these things would be brilliant, I know it doesn't work that way. But it will make them feel seen, comfort them, find sentences they want to keep near their heart and mind, find calm and some kind of soothing feeling that I cannot describe in words but exists in those moments of respite during a depressive episode.
2] When in a depressive episode, all intellectual and theoretical knowledge goes out the window. All the while I read these books, I thought of what it might have been like if I had read in my Great 2025 Depressive Episode. During it, no theory, no hard facts and feelings, no intellectual knowledge helps. Phillips, Roy, Benjamin, Baudrillard, Bifo: they all fail me and I fail them all. I did not include Fisher in the list, because I did think about him and his 2017 – and felt like I intimately might one day understand his 2017.
This is all to say, this set of books is a great compilation; from comforting thoughts, journalistic articles, to Depression for Dummies. It has something for everyone, and I took something away from each. And regardless of what an 'intellectual' approach/opinion of this might be, for the two reason I have stated here, this Kit is beyond astounding. I wish I had found a backpack like this, compiled by a human, put together physically by a human, thoughtfully – this, itself, is a feeling of warmth that can bring some echo of joy.
In one of these books, Lost Connections, the author Johann Hari writes, "Then, when I was thirty-one years old, I found myself chemically naked for the first time." He had drained at his antidepressants. When I read this, I felt a physical sensation of anxiety. In my mind [ha!] my current cocktail of medications have saved me from myself, but suddenly I was rooting for Johann. Like the 10-year-old me rooting for Bear Grylls on my Discovery channel screen when he was out of food, in a desert, with snakes all around him. I already knew this book was going to be a great read.
Continuing from my Point 2, although I did not think of all these theorists who I apparently hold close to my heart, I did think of Rachel Aviv's Strangers to Ourselves, which I had read in 2023 when I was not in a depressive episode. It got me thinking about a lot of things to do with how we/to approach topics of recovery or maintenance or 'cure' of mental illnesses. What does it mean to take care of it? Aviv, a journalist who writes for The New Yorker, went on a journey to understand mental illness, diagnosis, and identity – the book is part reporting and part personal memoir. She talks of individuals, psychiatric explanations, and how culture impacts what those explanations can mean. As soon as I read the last page, I wanted to read something like it again, and after three years, I have finally found it in Johann's writing.
I will walk through my experience of reading each book here. These are not reviews, I have not critiqued or rated them. I have thought about them, sat with them, slept with them; and have been inspired to make a small kit of my own to leave at my local coffee shop to give back to town that made things, 2025, better and livable.
Book 1] Lost Connections by Johann Hari
It was a great read, for the simple reason that: I started looking at depression as an entity unfamiliar to me when reading it, and it's not simply because I am not currently in an episode. I found things that took me by surprise, about depression and how it is scientifically studied [or looked at], about medications, and how much of the experimentation done on them have been inconclusive/misleading – and how, like all else, capitalism has an enormous part to play in how depression and its treatment is understood today.
Before writing more, I want to say that a part of the reason why it might have felt 'unfamiliar' to me is because the process that led me to finally be prescribed my mood stabilizers, which I cannot imagine my days without now, was a painful one. It was and always is very very apparent how every different drug, and every different class of drug, affected me and my depression. At several points in the book, I thought 'hey this could be understood as let me get off my meds' which is not a very good thing to do! Drugs for mental health diagnoses is certainly is a really contested area which is tricky to wade through.
I could see how scientific-study wise the results were what Johann spoke about in the book – that the effects of these drugs may not be as scientifically persuasive if looked at the particular studies he provides the examples of. But it is also a fact that people around the world have similar & familiar effects with medications that they share, can talk about, and understand each other through. The studies described in the book did not seem to completely explain this part to me. Have I had psychiatrists who have wanted to overload me with drugs? yes. Have I had psychiatrists who were absolute angels who saved me by tapering off all the violent ones and finding one that worked? also yes!
– all this is to say, I think it should have been underlined, highlighted, and italicized the part about 'please do not get off of your medications'. Johann, very clearly, is a journalist, and this too should have been a major stressing part of the information he relays to us in the book.
Johann is a great non-fiction writer, and a lot of points that he was making, and the way he described scientific studies and their results, made me look at the wall in front of me to digest what it meant after its meaning has been understood: what and how should I deal with this information? The compassion Johann writes with, the people who he interviews, and the social and systemic networks he close reads, are all extremely fascinating; more than anything, reading this during an episode, can make you feel connected and perhaps provide a relief that you may not be lost – that may be there are things that could be 'figured out'.
[I did write about this particular book more – in touching parts of its consistencies, arguments, and depth – and that's because I was looking forward to reading it quite a bit. also because it is a theoretical book that necessitates emotional engagement – and that's how I should approach thinking about its 'review'. might do another post talking about this + Strangers to Ourselves [Rachel Aviv], & Quit Everything [Bifo]! now, onto regular non-reviews:]
Book 2] The Comfort Book by Matt Haig
I appreciated how quick and easy of a read this was! And how it didn't have any structure to categorizing the forms, topics, and emotions. Sometimes, when I am overwhelmed by a reading, I write a bunch of quotes, draw, or draw tarot – and I liked to read something that was delicate in connecting the overarching feeling but letting all else loose.
This book is a collection of writings ["notes, proverbs, and stories"] that creates feelings of hope, safety, and brighter paths, without shoving optimism down your throat. I can see it as a personal project that has taken shape over periods of extreme pain and what Haig has felt through them and after them. It made me think, if I were to put comfort things in a packet, what would it look like?
He talked about how, when he was 25, he thought he can't take the world any longer – but now he's writing this at 45. "...while the feelings themselves were real, the things they led me to believe were resolutely not. Because I didn't really understand how I fell into suicidal depression, I imagined I would never find my way out." – there is something bigger than depression, and that thing is time. Even after being armed with so much theory, I know that if I had read this in early 2025, it would have made me feel something positive.
There were also some parts I thought I would like to write more about myself. He talks about the gap between the signifier and the signified. "...when I became ill, they took on a broader meaning. I felt like a walking signifier, signifying a person I could never quite be. There was a gap between what I looked like and what I felt like." Haig says that the way out he found was through talking and writing, and this gap between the signifier and the signified is quite productive: by externalizing internal things, the "moment we try and turn a thought into words, we place it into a shared world." I found another reason I like words.
It is a delicate book. Its quiet force can only be felt and read when in an intense emotional state.
Book 3] New Happy by Stephanie Harrison
The subtitle of this book is "Getting Happiness Right in a World That's Got It Wrong." Harrison explains her concepts by using visual graphics, and "takes you through the process of unwinding Old Happy, uncovering your own gifts, and using them to both improve your life and the world at the same time."
Okay, I am going to be honest here, this book isn't for me. Not the current me, not the depressive-me, not the reviewer-me. Considering I had to use a quote from its 'about' to tell you what it is about. I can see why and how it is written by someone who has an MA in positive psychology, and there are some good resources on their project website and actionable steps [activities] in the book, but I would have found it hard to take the book, as a whole, too seriously.
Here's the thing: it is practical in its approaches, it has good research in it, and I found it has a lot of convincing research – statistical and otherwise – on things we think are 'common knowledge' [like, we've become more individualistic as capitalism has risen]. This, I found really interesting to learn! It especially made me think a lot about what the shift from community to individual means for our sense of meaning-making and finding means/reasons for growth.
That being said: I would have liked reading about things about normal people and not people who are well known already; and it being a [and I am doing this summarizing on my own] 'here's how you find your purpose' kind of book turns me off a little. I am not even sure if happiness, purpose, and outlook can be related in all instances. I also don't think a lot of views portrayed as widely believed are actually widely believed.
It was good to read about happiness, and that rather than finding things we might be good at, focusing on things that not only can bring us joy but how our passion itself can be put to use productively.
Book 4] Depression for Dummies
I was so excited to read this one! I have always wanted to read a ' - for Dummies' book, and it didn't disappoint! I loved it.
To start: it has a lot of information, a lot of it. It can be overwhelming if someone thinks 'I must read this from the front cover to the back', but it is meant to be read by selecting topics and sub-topics you especially feel like exploring. I like that this book is in this Depression Kit, because it reads more objectively, although not clinically cold, it doesn't make it feel overly positive/empathetic – which can sometimes help during an episode.
I want to focus on why this feels like a more of an informative book which also translates into a soothing warm feeling of, okay I am not alone, this is something people have experienced and will experience. And I can/want to understand it. [even if one doesn't want to understand how to deal with it]. It talks of: making sense of memories, physical sensations of feeling a task [such as getting out of bed and brushing] is impossible, financial worries of help with depression, prescriptions of drugs and things beyond/before drugs, helping others with depression, working out, happiness, suicide, accepting your feelings, distorted thinking...and so much more.
While they list main topics, they have a big list of subheadings under each in their contents pages to make it easier for someone who is looking for something specific. The book has specific signs for things you may not want to forget, things that are practical advice or 'insights you can put to work', things that if you relate to/are feeling then its time you seek professional help, and things that will be interesting to understand [especially 'science behind' stuff] but can skip.
I am surprised I am about to say this, but I think this is the Star of this Depression Kit.
Apart from the books,
this kit has a Feelings Wheel, an emergency/helpful contacts and resources list, 31 Day Mood Tracker, Habit Tracker + Grounding Technique, and Journaling Prompts/Gratitude Journal. Laminated, with a white board marker – ready to use.
I cannot stress this enough: I am so glad that this is available at my public library! It is a wonderful kit, and I hope, I am rather confident, that it helps someone, or helps someone help someone. The approach these books take, with their very varied information and outlooks on depression, means that it is almost certain everyone will find at least one of them intriguing enough.
This has fiercely motivated me to build a small one of my own [without the books – because they are costly], and place it in my local cafe and other places. It would be like saying Thank You to Syracuse – because as much as I hate the freezing temperatures, it has recovered something in me.